Strip for the Message of God

Yes, even God supports this method of spreading his word. Former Vegas stripper Heather Veitch, from Riverside, California, sees her beauty and charm as a bonus for letting others know about God's wise ways. She started a website, J.C.'s Girls Girls Girls, to show present strippers that she knows where they are coming from and where they can go, if they so desire. The site addresses women in the business and the men who support them, offering testimonials of the converted and a DVD that teases "See us in ACTION".

However, with guide books like the above, Veitch and company shall be busy. Their plan? They come baring gifts. The J.C. Girls ministry visits dens of inequity to hand out T-shirts stamped with the ancient proverb "Holy Hottie" wrapped around Bibles. Veitch will even pay for lap dances to talk to women face-to-face to assure them that everyone is welcome at the house of worship, noting that

. . . strippers and porn stars don't have to quit their jobs before entering a church. She said, "Do we ask gluttons to stop eating too much before they come to church?"

Definitely not, says God. Because he knows that he and others always enjoy a good meal before service.

God and the Mind

God has been resting. He trekked to Pennsylvania for Groundhog's Day and prepped for weeks for an interesting Valentine's Day with Angelina Jolie. He tried to lay low for the early part of February in the way much of the country does. But he had to stick his head out of his hole for this story from McKinney, Texas about a pastor who claims that only God can cure a very sick woman of her mental illness.

In response to the woman cutting off her baby's arms, Pastor Doyle Davidson offered his treatment during court testimony.

"I do not believe that any mental illness exists other than demons, and no medication can straighten it out, other than the power of God."

God has left criminal justice and medicine to man. He's quite disappointed man has screwed up both of them.

Did You Get the Memo?

Someone screwed up. God knows he prepared a memo for the Westboro Baptist Church (GodHatesAmerica.com) about the rally in Baltimore last weekend against The Laramie Project, but he thinks that no one copied it to hand out. Not a soul from Fred Phelps' entourage showed, and those who gathered at Loyola College to counter-protest were left out in the cold. Phelps's caravan was also scheduled to visit Annapolis and a few other churches in Baltimore to tell them just how much God hates them (see "God Sends out Traveling Hate Band, Again" 1/24/06 posting). Fearing that Phelps has watched Office Space too many times and has taken the direction of the Westboro organization into his own hands, God says this is the last time he delegates small details for large projects. He will do his own printing and distribution for future hate rallies.